Warmer
by Ware-Yami-Tote
Summary: The sequel to "Cold." Kyo, now being famous has to look out for Tora, for the press can meddle and destory a lot of things. Dir en Grey, Kyo, Shinya, Die, Kaoru, Toshiya, and Yoshiki. hide references.
1. Chapter 1

Warmer

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

Section One

"…and you can have the band-" Click, that was the twentieth music label that had called the house since the debut on "Kamekara." It was getting ridiculous, and the photographers were harassing Tora. There was only one solution.

We had to move.

Hokkaido…too cold, though Tora would like that. I wanted to move to Okinawa, but it was too far from the recording studio. A 6 hour drive and a ferry ride would cost a lot of money.

All that really mattered was getting Tora out of the public eye, and Shinya would never leave me alone until I made sure that Tora was away from them. This was going to be a problem. Tora was going to art school, and transferring would…

Shit!

There was no easy solution for this!

I was getting frustrated, and Shinya would get angry with me if I didn't…

"Kyo, you pretty much have a black aura around you…" I turned around; Tora was taking her shoes off in the door way, "What's wrong?"

"I'm just stressed out…" I picked up the bowl of instant soba and put it on the kitchen table. We had our own place now, but it was weird without my mother always cleaning up after me, the dishes needed to be done. Die had crashed at our place last night, and he left a huge mess in the T.V room. "This music thing is all happening so fast, and I'm running out of patience…"

"Well, then tell everyone to shove it." She smiled and walked over to me, draping her arms over me as she said, "If you really are having a challenge with this, which I don't know why, do things your own way. The music industry is really one big corporate ladder, so just fuck the system."

A smiled formed on my face, she didn't know how hard it was, "They want me to write fan friendly shit, like The GAzettE stuff… I hate those guys…"

"Use some of your old stuff from high school." She patted my cheek, "That's some good poetry."

"Yoshiki said that I was a sick masochistic bastard," I sighed, "and if I ever brought it up again, he would drop me. I really want to tell him to fuck off. I have labels begging for a contract with us."

She was silent, Yoshiki had always been there, and the worry showed in her eyes, "Is there anything that I can do?" she let go of me, "I don't do a lot for you, but if there's anything-"

I put my finger over her lips, "You love me, that's enough."

"But-"

"Stop Tora," I turned around, and looked at the kitchen, "Maybe we should clean the house before your dad gets here, he would be uncomfortable."

"We're looking for more color," I hadn't even put my pastel to the paper yet, it was a final, and I was nervous, "There are lot's of ways to shade, think with purples and greens. Remember, red and green are opposites. Think about people, how they interact with the elements and animals."

_You love me and that's enough. _Was that what he thought?

"Tora, focus!" I snapped my head towards sensei then at my paper, "Look at this, the paper is ruined." There was larger red mark on the paper, "You're going to have to use this, and there are no replacement papers." She leaned in to whisper in my ear, "You're my best student, and I would think you could better."

I sighed and tried to work with the mistake I had made, letting my mind take over, the way I felt about all the people in my life, Makiko, Niimura-san, Shinya, Chisa…_Kyo._

My hand twitched, and hit the paper hard.

Ruined.

I felt my body start to tremble, and anger ran through my veins like poison. "SHIT!" I screamed, throwing the pastel across the room, "What the HELL?!" my foot kicked the canvas stand, and it send the paper and hard redwood flying across the room.

Then, I instantly regained control.

Kyo really affected me.

Everyone in the classroom, including sensei, was staring at me, completely shocked.

_I have to get the hell out of here! _That was the first thing that came to my mind.

The fresh air the entered my lungs helped my head clear, but soon something changed the feeling.

Cars, black cars, with cameras looking at me through the windows, crap!

Soon, the people from the cars left them, armed with recorders, notepads and cameras.

"Murasaki-san! A word, please!" I ran toward the doors, how had they found my school?! "What is your REAL relationship with Kyo? How long have you-" I pushed the door closed, and ran down the hallway, they couldn't enter the building right? Right?

That last thought was desperate as they opened the door, and saw me. I quickly took and left, looking for the office, but this place was so big, I got lost easily. I found myself backed in a corner; these people were ridiculously fast, and I had no place to go.

"This way, kiddo," the door that I was against fell behind me, and someone was pulling me into the classroom, "You need to learn to dodge those guys, quick, through the window." A cute scratchy voice laughed, and started to pull me through the desks.

"Who are you?!" I cried, confused and disoriented.

"Miyavi, I know your boyfriend." This boy had spiky hair, tattoos and crazy clothes, "He told me, along with the rest of us, "_If Tora is in trouble, you better help her, or you'll be missing your favorite part of your body. Understand?" _ He did do a pretty good impression of him, it made me laugh.

"Arigatougozaimashita!" he picked me up and helped my through the window, "What are you doing here?" I sat on the window sill, staring at the cute boy who was obviously out of place here.

"My cousin left some of her things here." He looked around, "I don't think they're still out there. Go down the stairs on the right, and there should be the main office."

"Thank you!" I climbed down the window.

"I'm sure that I'll see you again soon." He smirked and turned to walk away, "You owe me."

I made it to the office; I had never run down stairs that fast in my life. The receptionist asked me to take a seat, and wait until someone could help me. I prayed they could, I needed to get rid of these people, and they needed to be gone soon.

Rumors spread like crazy, none that were true, but it could damage Kyo's career.

Time seemed to pass, and soon a girl dressed in chains walked in. She looked at me, complete wonder filled her eyes. Quickly, she talked with the receptionist, and was put in one of the chairs like me. I could feel her eyes on me, it made me nervous.

Finally, a smooth voice asked me, "A-are you Tora Murasaki?"

I turned my head, wanting to run away. I didn't need any attention, Kyo needed it, but I wouldn't deny anything that was true, "Yes, I am." I smiled at her, trying to be nice and hide my aggravation, "Why do you ask?"

"That magazine said that you were Kyo's girlfriend." She seemed like she was afraid.

"Yea…" I had no clue where this was going, "I've known him since my third year in highschool."

"Really?" she smiled, "I'm sure you had a great sense of style then too!"

This took me off guard, she liked my clothes? "I've had this sweatshirt since…since I met Kyo." It was the striped purple one, and it had always fit me. "He got it for me, cause I ruined my old one when Tatsu- when I fell down a river bank. He came and rescued me."

"He rescued you?" she glowed, "Wow that is really cool. He seemed like such a hard ass!" She was getting really informal. A lot of people seemed to get like that when they talked to me. Toshiya was one of them, "But he's a great singer, I think they were the only good band on 'Kamekara.' Dir en Grey, right?"

"Yea," I exclaimed, "I'm really happy that he's starting to get famous!"

"Well, my friends and I," she started to explain, "wanted to watch The GAzettE, but they sucked compared to Dir en Grey, and the drummer is so cute!"

"And obsessive…" I whispered.

"What?" she tilted her head to the side.

"I knew Shinya, the drummer in high school to!" I changed the subject, "he was my best friend."

"Wow," she looked down, "You think you could get me his number?"

I almost laughed out loud, she wasn't serious was she? "He's mentally unable to date girls, I'm sorry."

"What does that mean?" she looked at me defensibly, "Do you have dibs on him?"

"No…." I sighed, wondering how I was going to say this, "He's healing from a broken heart right now."

"How sad…" despite this girls' appearance of black and chains, she was really nice, "Do you go to this art school?" she asked, changing the subject. "I do, I'm a junior."

"Freshman," I bowed my head smiling. "I just started, but I have a feeling I won't be here very long."

"Why?" she seemed like this made her sad.

"The damn reporters keep messing with Kyo and me…" I fiddled with bottom of my skirt, "It's getting really hard to live a normal life." I sighed, "I need to do something for Kyo, and he never lets me help him. He has this complex… he thinks he has to take care of me. The least I can do is leave school."

"Why don't you-"

"Tora, the Dean will see you now." The receptionist called to me. I looked to the girl, and she looked mad for getting interrupted.

"What was your name?" I asked, standing up.

"Miki." She smiled at me, "We'll see each other again, right?"

I gave the thumbs up, "For sure!"

"Get ready, Kyo." I glanced up from the old lyrics I had found in some boxes, I brought them from home, and wanted to make some use of them, "Yoshiki is coming, and according to Shinya, he's not in a very good mood."

"Why's that?" I looked at Toshiya, our newest member, "are hi s panties in a bunch?"

"hide's dead." He looked down, "it looked like he killed himself."

I stared at him, unsure of what to say. hide did have a drinking problem, what happened? "Why would he do something like that? Out of all the people I know, I don't think he would ever do that."

"People can surprise you…" obliviously it was hard on him too, "Let's just get this day over. Thing will get better, I'm sure."

Yoshiki showed up, looking ruffled and red eyed, "Hey guys," he sighed, "I brought a guest with me, you all know Miyavi?" A skinny guy with crazy hair and even crazier eyes jumped out from behind Yoshiki, "He's here to help Kaoru with acoustic." He looked at me, "Be nice."

"I will jeez…" I muttered under my breath. We were at our beginnings of making out first album, and our band was getting really well known in Japan. I had to cooperate with these people until I could do whatever I wanted.

About three hours into our practice, was when Miyavi walked up to me, "Hey, Kiyo." He called as he walked over, "I wanna talk to you."

I gritted my teeth, "Kyo, you jackass."

"Gomen." He laughed, "I saw your Tora today."

"I don't have a tiger, sorry." I turned around and got back to memorizing my lyrics. Obviously he wasn't taking my attitude, he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around, "What the FUCK do you want?"

"Your girlfriend, Tora." He confirmed, "She-"

"Okay, before I listen to your bullshit," I growled at him, "She isn't 'mine,' alright. She's her own person, it's not like I own her." He looked at me confused, unsure of what to say. He almost seemed to hesitate in talking to me, but he continued.

"She was getting harassed be the press." He informed me, "They went as far as going into her art school, but luckily, I was around to get her away from them."

"Arigatou," I tried to turn around again, but he had a firm hand on my chair, "Is there anything else, ass face? Are you trying to piss me off? I may be small, but I'm sure I can take you out." As I said all these profanities at him, not once did he look angry.

"I'm just saying you're not doing a very good job at…" he searched for words, "keeping her a safe distance from the public eye. Those people can ruin lives, and relationships. Why do you think celebrities date each other?"

"I understand, now leave me alone." I raised me fist at him, and he flinched. I was happy I scared him. He walked away briskly, and I turned back to my lyrics. Shinya was staring at me, from across the table. "What the fuck are you looking at?"

"Don't be like that," he shot back defensively, "just because Miyavi is annoying. I didn't do anything to you." He stared at me, his guard was up, and he didn't play well when he was emotional.

"You're right." I sighed, and ran my hands through my hair, it was fully blonde now. "I'm sorry; I'm just stressed about the paparazzi messing with Tora." I laid my head on the table, "I have no idea how I'm supposed to protect her from this.

"Scare the shit out of the press." Shinya suggested happily.

"What?"

"Do things so that they only do things from a distance." He laughed, "Knowing you, you could definitely pull that off." He stood up, and started towards the door, "It's lunch time, let's chow."

I sighed and followed him; after all, he was one of my best friends.


	2. Chapter 2

[I, Ware-Yami-Tote, dedicate this chapter of warmer to my kick ass cousin, Kuraku (Urakukay). His name is translated in Japanese katakana for his own protection or something like that… yea… He helped me with this chapter because I was having some issues figuring things out, and he came up with the main scene of this chapter. So love him, because I love him! YAY!]

Warmer

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

Section Two

"There is nothing that we can do," the dean explained to me, "Until I see evidence that what you say is going on. You're trying to tell me that you boyfriend is famous, and that the press is after you? That story seems a little farfetched. Sakura-sensei told me of your antics in class today."

"I'm really stressed right now…" I stared at the geisha shaped paper weight on his desk, "Kyo has been… confusing, and right now school is hard for me with all the press harassing me. I was just thinking that you could make so they can't come into the school."

"Tora, listen." The dean sighed and looked at me seriously, "This college us an open campus, there are regulations about letting normal civilians onto the grounds. They're here for the library and the art store; we hold certain items that aren't available elsewhere."

"Sir, they chased me!"

"I understand that," He looked at me with intense eyes, "They are normal civilians, telling them to leave would put this school into a mess of legal issues and discrimination. This is a very well known college; do you think the board of directors would allow you to ruin the reputation, just because your boyfriend is rock star? I think not."

Tears were burning my eyes, and they started to over flow on my cheeks, "I understand s-sir," I stood and turned around, "I'll figure it out myself." I stormed out of his building, all suits were the same. They were so worried about reputations and money.

When I came from the small hallway to the waiting room, Miki was still waiting in the chair. Hurriedly I walked over her and bowed, then quickly asked her, "Do you have cell phone? I need to call Kyo."

"Have you been crying?" she asked concerned, grabbing her purse and handing me a silver phone, "What happened in there?" she looked at me, she had a somewhat scared look in her eyes.

"The world is a fucking race, and I'm loosing!" I gasped at her, the tears kept falling, "I might have to quit school or something…" I punched in Kyo's number and put the phone to my ear, his ring tone came on, 'Ghost,' by Buck-Tick. I always sang along but this time I didn't.

"Who are you," he sort of yelled into the phone, "and why do you want to touch me there!" I had to pull the phone away from my face for a second.

"Kyo, it's me…" I almost let out a sob.

"Tora?!" he sounded like there was food in his mouth, I was bothering him again. "What's wrong babe? You sound like you've been crying!"

"Just come and get me, and we'll talk about it when you get here…" he said okay, and told me he loved me, and then we hung up, "I hate this…" I looked at Miki, she looked confused, "Can you wait with me until he gets here… I don't want to be alone right now."

"You got it." She smiled at me, trying to cheer me up.

Miki's reaction when Kyo showed up was better than I had thought it would be, she just stared, "What the fuck is wrong with her?" he pointed at her, and grimaced a little.

"I don't think she's ever been this close to a rock star." Kyo laughed, and wrapped his arms around me, I felt better already, being in his arms was better than an art final.

"Shin's in the car, we have some sad news…" we had gotten to the car with Tora's bag, and I was sitting on the hood of the car, I lit a cigarette, "Maybe I should tell you later…"

"This day couldn't get any worse…" Tora looked terrible, and I really wanted to take her home and hold her, but Yoshiki had no clue that we were here getting Tora, "I just want to be with you…" she sighed and sunk her head low.

"Tell me what happened on the way to the studio," I looked at my watch, it was well past one o'clock, "Yoshiki is going to kill me."

"Your excuse is...?" Kaoru hit me in the back of the head as I walked into the room. "You really have a lot of nerve, Yoshiki is…"

I watched as his eyes went to Tora, he could obviously tell she had been crying, "Hey Kao-kun, what's up?" she asked feebly, "Please, don't be too mean to Kyo, he had to come and get me. Where's Yoshiki?" She looked around for him, but he wasn't here?"

"Yea, where is he?" I looked at Miyavi, he was staring at Tora, "Hey jackass, why are you still here?"

"It's my job, Kiyo." He sighed and looked away from Tora, his eyes met mine.

"It's Kyo you fuck!" I growled at him, and put my arm around Tora, I had a feeling that Miyavi liked her. Every guy who met her liked in someway.

"Yoshiki is looking for you two, but you disappeared." Kaoru crossed his arms, "You're bad, and you should feel bad." I rolled my eyes, and the door opened behind me.

"Kyo where the hell-" his eyes glanced over to Tora, he always had a soft spot for her, "To-chan, why are you here, are you alright?"

"Yoshiki-senpai," Tora looked like she was going to cry again, it broke my heart, "I heard about hide… I'm so sorry. He was always so friendly to me, to all of us. Is there anything I can do?"

"Paint a mural of him, that would be great." He smiled and ruffled his hair, "I know how good you are. Keep the pink hair in mind." He laughed nervously, "He wanted you to paint him, but he thought asking would be rude."

"He should have known that was ridiculous…" she muttered.

"You can hang around until practice is over." He one arm hugged Tora and shuffled awkwardly out of the room. He made me feel, strange. hide was so suddenly taken away from us, and any one of us could be gone in an instant.

I grabbed Tora and hugged her tightly; we needed to think of a solution to the press problem.

I woke up the next morning, hearing sounds of yelling and cursing. Mostly from Kyo. I walked down the hallway, and there he stood, with a paintball gun, and full camouflage clothes. He wore bright yellow sunglasses with a smoke in his teeth.

I opened the sliding door, and I overheard him talking, "You want a word? I'll give you a fucking word!" he pulled out an ink pen and took one of the paint pellets, then quickly wrote, '辞.' the kanji for word.

He shoved the pellet back in, cocked and shot it right into the face of a man, with a camera. Right before the paint bullet made contact with his face, he snapped a picture. "Kyo, what the hell are you doing?!" I yelled at him, he turned around and smiled at me, crookedly.

"Ohayo, babe, how are you?" he reached out for me, but I stayed where I was standing. "What's wrong?"

"How could you ask me that?!" I was furious, "I wanted to have a good Saturday with my boyfriend, but he's sniping the paparazzi… Kaoru's right, you're bad and you should feel bad."

He looked at me a little defeated, "I'm sorry…"

"Do you have an explanation?" I crossed my arms and gave him an angry look.

"It was Shin's idea." I rolled my eyes as he explained this to me, "Well, he told me to make the press afraid of me. I thought this would be a good idea…" he set the paint gun down, and hopped of the railing of the balcony, "Go get dressed, and I'll take you out someplace nice for breakfast."

He smiled at me, and kissed my lightly on the lips. "Fine…" I sighed, "But don't ever do that again." I turned and around, and he smacked my back-side lightly and laughed. I felt heat race up my neck, even thought we had been together for four years, I still felt like we were seventeen.

"You better stop being so sexy," we warned me as I turned around to yell at him, "or we might never make it to breakfast." Kyo was trying to get me in bed a lot lately for some reason, but there was something wrong with me.

Sometimes, Tatsu still made his way into my thoughts.

Looking to the ground, "Doesn't it ever get old?"

"What the hell…?" Kyo looked at me; pure confusion swam in his eyes.

"I mean…" I searched for words, "Guys are… well… they get tired with the same girl over and over. Sometimes, their interests go to other places. You're going to be a famous rock star, and there will be tons of girls throwing themselves at you. I just-"

Before I could finish my sentence, Kyo grabbed and kissed me passionately. I hadn't expected this, I could have sworn he would have gotten mad and called me crazy. He pulled away from the kiss, leaving me breathless, "If you think I'm interested in other women and think our love life is getting 'boring', you need to get checked for Alzheimer's."

"Kyo…I…" I leaned into him, and rested my chin on his shoulder, "I love you so much…" tears burned my eyes, and Kyo pulled my face up to look at him.

"I love you too." He assured me, "But…" his face got bright red, "is it getting boring for you?"

"Wha-?"

"-Cause I can try other things." He whispered the last part.

"Kyo," I almost laughed out loud, "That's the LAST thing you need to worry about."

He almost seemed to sigh in relief, "I'm glad." The rare color in his face disappeared, and he looked at me seriously, I knew what was going to happen. He quickly picked me up, and headed down the hallway, kissing me ferociously. I could barely keep up with his mouth.

He unbuttoned my pajama shirt and trailed kisses from my stomach to the valley in between my breasts. A small gasp escaped my mouth, I was loosing control, but I didn't care. This was always a good experience for us; Kyo's and my physical relationship was always very strong.

I was always thankful that our verbal relationship was stronger.

Kyo quickly removed the top, and my pants. Somehow, his shirt was gone, showing the tattoos that he had gotten. I ran my fingers over his arms, tracing the ink of the beautiful dragon. He told me that is was his soul, and that as soon as I picked a spot, he would get a tiger any where I wanted him to.

Slowly, he rubbed my stomach, if anyone else had done that, I would have laughed. I was extremely ticklish, but he always touched me right. His hands rested at the hem of my underwear, "Tora, you're a goddess, do you know that?"

Soft laughter escaped my lips, he always thought so highly of me. He leaned in and kissed my neck gently. It sent goose bumps down my spine, like an electric wave. "Sing to me…" I whispered, "My favorite song, the one Yoshiki didn't like."

'_Kimi to futari de, aruita, ano goro no michi wa nakute…'_

He continued to sing to me as he stripped me of my panties, and rested himself over me. He kissed and nipped my neck playfully.

_You love me and that's enough…_

"N-no." I said softly, pressing my hands on his chest pushing my away.

_Does he really love you back though? _Tatsu's dark evil eyes stared back at me.

…_that's enough._

"It's not enough!" I cried, "I want to give you more!"

"Tora, snap out of it!" Kyo held me, tears drifted in his eyes, "What are you talking about?"

_You love me…_

Tatsu glared at me, _is it really enough?_

"Tora, I love you." Kyo said, trying to break into my thoughts like he always did when I had my attacks, "You're the most important person in the world to me; you've always kept me…sort of sane. When I first saw you walking up to my house, after I had snuck back in, I knew that you were an amazing woman."

"I do nothing for you…" I cried, "You're always buying me stuff, taking me places. I don't have anything to offer you. I owe you so much, I feel like my love isn't enough."

"Tora, I do all those things because you had nothing when you were with your mother." He confessed, "You deserve everything in the world, I just try to give you as much of it as possible. You do more for me than you know." He kissed my forehead.

"Like what?" I pressed on, wanting answers.

"Without you, I don't think I would have gotten the power to make my band what it is." He explained, his eyes seemed far away, "I would probably be in the Yakuza by now. They liked me, and it looked inviting. Money, women, power, but I know now that it was a stupid child's dream. You snapped me back into reality. I need you more than you know, I love you."

The meaning of his words hit me like an anvil hitting cartoon characters. I felt his words, the sincerity and love he put in every syllable. Without further discussion, I pulled my head up and kissed him. The one thing I gave him was peace of mind, I couldn't worry him. I loved him too much.

Kyo took this as an invitation and dove right in. All of the love that I denied him for a few weeks was built up, and I could feel that he wanted to let it out. He kissed me hard and tenderly at the same time. I moved my hand down his chest and grabbed him firmly; he faltered slightly, but quickly recovered.

He growled, telling me everything I needed to know. He lifted my leg and slammed into me hard. I gasped at the sudden force that hit my body. Kyo moaned, the vibrations flowed through my being as the sound escaped his throat.

I wrapped my arms around him, letting him take me away to place him and I belonged.

"Never leave me," Kyo whispered in my ear.


	3. Chapter 3

Warmer, Section Three

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

Tora looked at me with half closed eyes, she smiled warmly at me. "What are you thinking about?" I asked her, hoping she would answer.

"About you." She said seriously.

I half laughed; she always told me what I wanted to hear, "What do you want to do with the rest of the day?" I sat up and yawned, "We could just stay in bed all day, or we could…" I trailed off thinking of what I wanted to do, "Go swimming at the indoor pool at Heaths…. It's up to you."

"Kyo," she pushed herself up lazily and sighed, "hide's funeral is today at three o'clock." She reminded me, "I'm almost finished with that painting, and I just have to do the back round."

"Can I see it?" I asked excitedly, slightly pouting.

"Yea…" she smiled at me, "I just hope hide is up there, knowing we all loved him." Tora stood up and picked up my camouflage shirt and put it on, it fit her like a dress, "I haven't been able to paint anything lately. Stress really messes with me, but hide must be guiding me."

"I'll bet." I smirked at her, she always seemed so happy when hide and Tora hung out. They had a lot of the same interests, and the same straight yet silly sense of sense of humor. He managed to teach Tora how to play the guitar. He did much better than Die and Kaoru; they never understood how he did it either. Tora said he was good with words.

She led me to her art room, and for an studio room it was surprisingly neat and clean. There were several paintings and drawings on the walls and on canvases. She had finished the one with me in the suit and the half red hair, and now in the center of the room, hide stared at me.

His hair was pink and shaded with red brilliantly. His expression was calm, but there was slight feeling of mischief. It was like he would hop out of the painting and ask me to go drinking. His eyes had a gleam that I remember when we first met.

Curiosity.

"Tora…" I whispered, she always captured people's true self in her paintings, "It's perfect. You don't need a background; he makes the whole painting with out one. He brings the white to life. You're amazing, how did you do that?"

"I just did…" she put her hand on her heart, "I let my feelings for him take over, and before I knew it, he was staring back at me. I tried to put a background, but I feared that I would mess it up."

"Yoshiki is going to be so pleased." I grabbed her chin and pulled her close, "You're so talented. hide would be proud, I wish he could see it."

"Someday he will." She leaned forward and kissed me lightly and pulled away, "We should get showered and ready ourselves for the funeral. What do you think?"

"Definitely." I confirmed.

I looked down at his peaceful body, covered in all sorts of flowers.

So many people had come to see him. He was so important to the music world, and he was gone. I could feel more tears forming and cascading out of my eyes. I had never cried this much, and seeing his body made me more emotional.

Kyo squeezed my hand tightly, trying to encourage me. I looked at him, his eyes were just as wet as mine, I had never seen him like this. He leaned over to me and whispered in my ear, "I feel like a wuss." He confessed, looking slightly frustrated.

"You're not, he was a great man." I whispered back.

Even though this was hide's funeral, there were several people from magazines and journals here. Once we had showed up, the press freaked out and took several pictures of Kyo and I. He held my hand tightly and smiled at me, never faltering, until he saw hide.

"_Please have a seat." _The funeral home was huge, so many fans and people were packed into the room. Thankfully, Yoshiki had reserved us seats in the front. We went to them, and there the rest of our friends sat.

Kaoru looked miserable, and Shinya looked like he wanted to pass out. Toshiya fiddled with his shirt silently, and Die looked concerned but bored. Yoshiki, Heath, Toshi, Taiji, and Pata where no where to be found.

Kaoru patted the seat next to him with my name on it. I sat down next to him, and wrapped his arm around me. "How are you?" he asked me, squeezing my shoulder, "Did you give the painting to Yoshiki, we was looking for you."

"Yea," I sighed, wiping a tear off of my face, "he told me he wouldn't look at it until we presented it. I guess he trusts me that much."

"He should, Tora." Toshiya leaned into the conversation, "That painting that you did that I saw of Shin was amazing. I didn't know that paint could look that real, all that yellow smoke was so cool!" He reminded me of the painting that I made a year ago for Shinya's birthday.

"Well this one is even better!" Kyo commented.

"_Please quiet down people, Hayashi Yoshiki would like to say some words." _Yoshiki came out of the back room, and two men followed behind him. One man held my painting, and it was covered with a veil, the other had a stand for it. The set it up quickly and left in a flash.

"As all you people stand in front of me and listen to my words," Yoshiki stared, "We must remember, that we must not linger in the past. People continue their lives no matter what; hide wouldn't want us to keep mourning over his death. He would say, 'It's alright, I can keep rockin' in heaven.'"

After those words all of the boys from X-Japan came from the back room and one by one they came to the podium. Their words told of his life and things that we said and did. Several people busted out in tears in the middle of their speeches, someone had to leave.

Time passed slowly, and I stared at Kyo, he listened is intensively at what his idols said. His expression was blank and fierce at the same time. I could almost see the gears in his head working as he took every word that they said.

Suddenly, Kyo turned his head to me and stared. Kaoru nudged my side and whispered, "Tora, you're up. Show us you're painting."

I felt my eyes get wide, "Come on Tora, hide would want you to present this." Yoshiki said into the microphone, "I know it's amazing."

All eyes were on me as I stood from my chair and slowly walked up to the stage. I walked up the stairs and looked at Yoshiki, he motioned me to the podium. I almost shook my head 'no,' but I kept walking and managed my way to the podium.

I sighed and calmed myself, "When I made this painting, I put into consideration of all the people that loved him, and the fans that he loved. You all made his life possible, but as quickly as he had come, he disappeared from sight." I could feel tears starting to overflow, "H-he…was such a good friend of everyone that he met, and even now his laughter and music sings through the world."

"This painting is for him. I put everything that I had into this canvas," I walked toward the veil and rested my hand on the cloth, "I hope you can see its true intention." I called louder, and I pulled it off.

Several people stared in awe, some people gasped. Everyone from our part of the room started to stand up and cheer after several seconds of silence. I heard Kyo yell, 'Hell Yea!' and after that everyone else stood and cheered for me. Yoshiki grabbed me in a hug, "Thank you so much, you're so brave." He whispered in my ear.

I sat down with the others and listened to the rest of the service quietly, I could feel several sets of eyes looking at me. I ignored them and stared at the ground. Yoshiki said that the painting would go in the rock museum in Tokyo, but I really didn't care. As long as hide was happy with it, I none of it mattered.

The ride back to the house was quiet, Kyo didn't want to go see him buried. Either did I, death wasn't something I dealt with well. Kyo was just bored, and he felt like he had already paid his respects. He was going to help open a 'hide Memorial Stadium."

It was sort of exciting, and he would play there often.

Tora was quiet for the days that had passed, and Yoshiki was equally reclusive.

I was standing in front of a cigarette dispenser when Kaoru walked up to me, "There you are, Toshiya's looking for you, says it's important. His cousin goes to that art school, and she wanted to talk to you." I stared at him, I was in a low mood, and frankly, I didn't want to deal with anyone.

"Fine..." I picked up the smokes that I was staring for five minutes, and went to look for Toshiya. He wasn't hard to find, as he was always playing his bass in the same chair, "What do you want? I'm going home early today to be with Tora, make it quick."

He stared at me for a moment then said, "My itoko told me that she saw Tora get in with the guitar kid... Mibagi.... something like that. She said that she didn't look to please to be going, so she called me as fast as she could."

"Who's your cousin?" I asked tapping my foot, she could have been the photographer who was trying to set Tora and I up.

"Miki," he put his bass down, "You met her at the school, but she has a little crush on you. She kinda froze when she saw you. She acts like she likes Shin."

"I remember her..." I grabbed my jacket, and opened the door, "Thanks Tosh, I'll see you later."

"You going to go find her?" he walked towards me, "Let me help you-"

"You finished you're part of the song!" I pushed him playfully, "Don't worry, I'll be good." I turned away, without looking back at Toshiya. I had lied to him, there was no way I was going to be good. I was going to break every bone in his body.

I was put on this earth to make sure that Tora as safe, and Miyavi was one big publicity scandal waiting to happen. He would try to break Tora and I apart, and there was no way that I was letting that happen. Tora was mine, and I was hers, we had an equal relationship, and I wasn't going to allow some weasel mess up everything that we worked so hard for.


	4. Chapter 4

Warmer Section Four

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

_Konnichiwa, this is Murasaki Tora, please leave a message! _That was all that I could hear echoing in my head. Her phone was turned off, because she was in class before, and she must have forgotten to turn it on.

I sat in my car, on the side of the road. My parking job was bad, and the end of the car was sticking out, I really didn't give a crap. I needed to find Tora, stress and panic was beginning to make its way through the echo in my head.

"What the fuck am I going to do?!" I yelled and slammed my head against the steering wheel. One blow to the plastic piece didn't seem like enough, and after about seven of them, I felt a little better. Kyoto was big, and there was no way that I was going to find Tora without a lead of where she might be.

There was a knock on the window, and it surprised me. There was girl in a school uniform, the one that my school had when I went. The girl made a motion with her hand to lower the window, and for some reason I did, "What is that you need?"

She smiled at me and put her hand on my car, "Are you looking for Tora?"

I stared at her in shock, how in the hell did she know? "What makes you think that?" I snarled, tempted to roll the window back up.

"Well, everyone knows how madly in love you are with her…" she turned red for a moment, then continued, "I don't think a guy like you would be sitting here having a tantrum like that unless it was important."

I ground my teeth together, "So what do you want in return for information? My autograph, a kiss, what do you want?"

She laughed, "Maybe if you were Shinya, then yea! I just want to help you." Why the hell was he so popular with the girls? "I saw Miyavi-san take her to the Visual-Kei store, she looked a little pissed off. So maybe… you should hurry."

The minute she told me, I almost laughed out loud, "Visual-Fucking-Kei?!" I slammed both of my fists on the steering wheel, "Why the hell there! Crap! Shit! Fuck!" I glanced back at the girl; she looked a little scared, "Thank you. You totally have free tickets to our show next week!"

I rolled the window back up, the girl looked confused, but I proceeded to drive away. The damned gothi-crappy girly place was all the way across town. I had to drive fast, because… I was scared, and extremely pissed.

Miyavi was going to get it.

Impatience….I was so bored sitting there getting my make-up done. The woman had at least put on two layers of muck, and my face felt heavy. I wanted to get back to school, what Miyavi did was embarrassing and uncalled for.

I can still remember the silence that filled the room when he walked in and dragged me down the hallway. At this point in my life, nothing really seemed to surprise me; I just kept quiet and let him pull me into his car and down the street.

"Wow Tora, you look amazing!" I turned my head, Miyavi was dressed in purple and holding a silver guitar. Even his lip rings were purple chrome, "Are you ready to see if you're camera friendly? It'll be fun!"

"Kyo is going to be pissed…"

When I saw the bright neon lights of the Visual-Kei building, anger was even more present. I hated this place; it was filled with a bunch of homos and cross dressers. I almost laughed in Yoshiki's face when he suggested that we joined them.

I walked into the building, feeling completely out of place. The lobby was filled with color and drag. Several men in dresses and dark make-up were sitting in a chair, talking politely; I almost had the urge to go punch them for no reason at all. I ignored the impulse, and walked towards a back door.

"Sir, you can't go back there." I receptionist stood up from her chair.

"I can do whatever the hell I want to do," I growled at her, "I'm Kyo-Fucking-Niimura. Where the hell is Miyavi?!" the woman looked at me, scared and unsure of what to say.

"If you don't leave," she warned, "I will have to call security, and they can escort you out, Sir. Would you want that?" she put her hand on the phone threateningly.

I walked to her desk and pushed her hand away from the phone, "Do you want me to rip your head off?" I jolted the phone up, and threw it across the room. "Cause I'll fucking do it! Where the FUCK is Miyavi?! That bastard took of with Tora, and if I don't find her, I'll burn this place down!"

The woman started to shake, and tears were in her eyes, "They're on the tenth floor." She sighed and sat down, lowering her head.

I felt a little satisfied, and headed back towards the door. There were six elevators behind that door, so I just picked which ever one was open. Luckily, there was only one other person in it. I stared at her in front of the elevator for a minute.

She was blonde and taller than me; another girl was taller than me again. Damn.

When she saw me, she started to laugh, "Kyo Niimura, this was the last place I expected to see you here. Are you looking for something?!" She seemed bright and friendly; maybe it was okay to talk to her. Even though she was in a mini skirt, and Lolita like clothes.

First things first, how in the hell did she know my name? "Do I know you?"

She reached her hand out, "I'm Kazuhiko, I can't believe you don't recognize me, Miku would be so sad! My band name is Bou!" What she said hit me like an anvil, she was a he! This place was so confusing. I eyed his hand, trying to remember a Kazuhiko and a Miku.

"Did I go to school with you or something?!" This blond cross dresser was familiar, but the long hair was throwing it all off. "I have no clue who you are…"

"Never mind, Tora would recognize me." He had his arm in the elevator the whole time, so that it wouldn't close, "Are you looking for her? I saw her with that guitar guy, from the boy band here with her. What's she doing here?!"

"That's what I came to find out," I stepped into the elevator, "she's supposed to be on the tenth floor. Hopefully that lady wasn't lying."

"Well, let's go find out." Kazuhiko pushed the button, and the elevator lurched up.

"Put your arm here." Miyavi grabbed me for the seventh time, and made me grab the guitar. I was covered in purple glitter, and the set was with purple clouds. I liked the color purple, but this was getting ridiculous.

"Miyavi this is really inappropriate…" I pulled myself away from him again, distancing myself from him slightly, "I know that you have good intentions, but, I really should get back to school. Having a rock star as a boyfriend is hard enough."

"Well, what would you think about a pop-star then?" he eyed me with a smirk.

"I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that." I turned away from him, and started walking down the stairs, but he grabbed my arm. I faced him, and tried to look angry, "Let go of me, I want to leave. If Kyo finds out, he'll kill you. He hates Visual-Kei."

"Who says that he has to find out?" Miyavi pulled me close to him. "He's just some midget; maybe you need a man who can protect you better." He pressed his face to mine, but it was only for half a second, because in flash, Miyavi was on the floor getting pummeled.

"YOU MOTHER FUCKER! DO YOU HAVE A DEATH WISH?!" Time seemed to slow as I watched Kyo straddle Miyavi, and punch him the face repeatedly. "DON'T YOU EVER EVEN LOOK AT TORA AGAIN!"

I hand went around mine, and I looked at who it belonged to, "You should come with me, and let Kyo cool down." She smiled softly at me. I looked around the room, and the photographer looked shocked. It took a lot not to laugh.

I followed the girl, and let things happen.


	5. Chapter 5

Warmer, Section Five

Dir en Grey

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

I sat in the waiting room, next to Bou. He smiled at me every second that we waited for Kyo to return. "What is that is so fascinating about me?" his smile faltered a little.

"You've just always been so pretty!" he bounced a little, this boy wasn't normal, he seemed to be a little ADHD… but I dealt with Toshiya all the time, so he couldn't be that bad.

"Thanks…" I was trying to converse with him, but my mind was thinking about Kyo, what the hell was taking so long? "I'm going to go use the bathroom, can you wait here?" Bou nodded at me, and looked down to the ground. I had started for feel a little strange.

When I had sat down to use the toilet, I noticed, there was a blood spot on my panties. The purple ones Kyo had replaced from before… they were ruined. I was so bad at taking care of underwear. I wasn't supposed to start it until next month. I started taking birth control, my periods were now irregular, and I only had it three times a year.

I felt like Kyo shouldn't have to worry.

Now I was in a jam, I had no supplies, and I was alone in the bathroom. There was a tampon dispenser next to the sink, and I had some cash in my pocket. If only someone would walk in. I could give her the money, she would understand. It happens to everyone, right?

I heard the door open, and a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders, but there were only a few footsteps when a smooth voice said, "I walked into the girls' room again, the signs look too similar here! I hate this building." The voice said the last part under its breath, and it sounded like a man.

_Shit, shit, shit, shit! _Ran through my mind, I had two seconds to make a decision I could regret. "Excuse me, could you help me!?" my mouth said before my mind had made itself up, "It's kinda personal, but would you mind?"

"Ah, is there someone one here?" he asked as I dug into my pants pocket for a few yen.

"Just please listen to me," I pleaded, "I won't bother you again."

"Sure, what is it?" he seemed to be a little scared.

I placed some yen on the red tile and kicked the change under the stall door, "Can you get me a tampon," I felt myself turning red as I asked him, "the machine is next to the sink, please…"

There was a pause, and a few footsteps. I became surprised when I saw a hand reach down and grab the change, and he walked towards the sink. He was silent for a few seconds then said, "What size?"

I forgot that he was guy and didn't have the need for those kind of thing, "The small ones please, I'm real sorry about this." There was clicking sound of the machine, and soon a hand was reaching over the door, with the little object.

I grabbed it, almost like it was a holy object. I really wanted to know who had given this to me, maybe I could have him sign the wrapper, "Don't worry about, maybe I'll see you around…even though I don't know what you look like." He laughed, and his feet disappeared from view.

"Wait for me outside," I said without thinking again, "So I can thank you for real."

He didn't say anything, the door shut and I was alone again. I let out a breath that I had been holding in since he had walked in. That was something Toshi would have found funny, Shin might have laughed too, but not me. No one could ever find out, it was too awkward.

I finished what I was doing, and walked to the sink, taking a good hard look at myself. This was going to be really hard. Why did I always act like a coward when I was embarrassed?

I finally opened the door, facing my fear, and tall figure was standing to my right. He had dyed blond hair, and tan sunglasses. He was taller than most Japanese men, making him look like he could eat me alive.

Gackt.

Gackt.

Gackt.

A really big pop-star handed me a tampon. He turned to me, a slight grin was on his face, "Well that doesn't happen to me everyday, are you alright now?" I stared at him, unsure of what to say. Words wouldn't form, and I felt a little light headed, "What, do you need some Ibuprofen?"

"N-no…" I sighed and bowed, "Thank you for your kindness, Gackt-san."

"Anytime…" he looked like he wanted to laugh, "May I know your name?"

"Tora Murasaki." I smiled at him, feeling head travel up my neck.

"Tora?! Oh man, your boyfriend just got hauled off by the cops." He lost his complete 'coolness' and looked really worried, "You have to go and see him. He supposedly assaulted Miyavi!" he grabbed my arm, drug me toward an elevator, one became available, and he pushed me in and followed after.

"Wait, the cops?!" I got a grasped around the situation. "Why? Doesn't security take care of those sorts of things? I mean it was obvious he kinds stole his way into the building. You can't even get in without a membership! Wait how'd you get in here, you're not Visual-Kei!"

"I'm not wearing extreme purple make-up," he started, "and asking random guys for tampons." He had really good point, so I let it go, "That's not important right now, Kyo could go to jail." The elevator came to the first floor, and the second the doors opened, I saw a lot of action in the lobby.

Kyo was kicking at Miyavi, the cops were trying to grab Kyo, Kyo was elbowing the cops in the face, and Miyavi was backing as far away from Kyo as he could. Random man-girls ran in all directions, and Bou looked like he was going to throw up. This was completely out of control.

"STOOOOOOOP!" I looked at Gackt, he was standing on the receptionists desk, "CAN WE STOP THE VIOLENCE FOR A FEW SECONDS, PLEASE?!"

"Who the fuck are you?" Kyo turned his attention to Gackt, along with everyone else.

Gackt grabbed my arm, and pulled me up, "Your girlfriend has something to say, I think."

I looked down on all the people, I became a little envious of tall people at that moment, "Kyo stop, he didn't do anything to me. Just stop all of this! How in the hell did you all get down here so fast?" The last part came out of my mouth as an after thought.

"I fell a few flights of stairs." Miyavi growled.

"That was rhetorical!" I screamed, "God, why are you men so stupid?!" I threw my hand in the air, "I give up! I'm done being an object! None of you guys can seem to grasp that I am a human being! I just wanted to be an art student! I had goals, and dreams of moving to Paris and making masterpieces!" The room was completely silent; all of them stared at me, even the police. "I never wanted to be a rock stars girlfriend! I can't even get through school without people asking me gross questions about Kyo, or the other band-mates! People think they can just walk into my class and kidnap me, and I'm done! No more!"

By the time I was finished, I felt really tired and weak. I felt myself starting to fall when Gackt grabbed my arm, and supported my weight, "Are you alright?" he whispered in my ear.

"Just take me home." I sighed.

"Tora!" I looked back, Kyo was fighting about four police officers, reaching towards me, "Tora, I'm sorry, I fucked up!" the cops continued to walk him towards the door, "I have one phone call, right? Can I call you?!" his eyes looked lost.

I nodded my head, and immediately he ceased to struggle with them. They took him outside and threw him in the back of the police car. The paparazzi stood in a huge circle next to the car, taking picture after picture. Kyo didn't saw a word to any of them

He went without a word. For once, he was silent.

But, I broke him.


	6. Chapter 6

Warmer Section Six

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

I felt empty, like someone had taken my heart from my chest with a hacksaw, and spit all over it. They then proceeded to step in the mucus covered piece of flesh, and kick it in a puddle of mud. The cold seat of police car had nothing on this cold feeling.

I ruined Tora's life.

She was right; she wanted to be an accomplished art student. I knew that even before started the music industry. I knew it wasn't going be easy for her, but I still pursued my dream, and didn't give a second thought to hers.

She deserved better.

I was hot headed and stupid, what the hell did she even see in me. The press saw all the details of the fight, and it would be online soon. People would see Tora with that guy-

That guy! Who the hell was he?! He looked really familiar, but I never paid much attention to Visual-Kei guys. _He had better take good care of Tora, or I'll beat the crap out of him too! _Was all I could think about. Red hot jealousy pulsed through my senses, he was holding her, and that was not okay with me.

What was going on now? Was she safe? Did the press start to question her? I was sure that she was with that guy, was he able to make sure she got out of the picture. After all, that was what she wanted. She didn't want to be with me anymore.

It's hard to forgive someone when they ruin your life.

If I called her, what would she do? Would she come and get me? I made another decision without thinking, and it caused a lot of trouble. Would she come for me? Did she still love me? If she still did, would she ever forgive me?

I fucked up.

"So you're telling me that Kyo got taken off by the pigs for beating the shit out of Miyavi." Kaoru stared at me, "And Gackt gave you a tampon?" I stood at the door step of Kaoru's apartment; he had a wide grin on his face.

"That part isn't important!" I screamed, Gackt stood by his car waiting. He brought me here, and told me he would take me anywhere, "Kyo's in jail, we have to get him out! He might start his own gang in there and then get thrown into prison for it!"

Kaoru stood in deep thought for a moment, "What do I get out of it, if I help you?"

Makiko Marasaki and Kaoru Niikura had always like each other, even though he was much older than her. She was 16 and he was 19, and I never would allow it. Makiko was my sister, and I needed to make sure that she was out of the press' eye. For years Kaoru had tried to get me to say they could see each other, but I would always say no.

I lowered my head, defeated, "Fine, you can have Makiko."

Kaoru grabbed my shoulders, "That's not what I was thinking about!" he laughed, "but that's even better! Much better than you cleaning my house for a month!" he put his arm around my shoulder, "About time you gave in, so give me her new cell phone number!"

"Not now, later!" I felt really small, well smaller than normal, "Can we just go to my house and wait for Kyo's phone call?" I rand my hands over my face, I was feeling really tired. When I looked at my hand, I realized that there was purple and glitter all over my hand.

"You better go wash that off. The bathroom is to the left, second door." Kaoru pushed me through his door, a sort of stale sell came to my senses, "I'll tell Mr. Serious that we're going to your apartment." He pointed at Gackt, and walked away.

When I examined Kaoru's apartment, it was in the state of total disarray. There wasn't anything gross about it, it was just unorganized. A small summary of what was one the floor was, music books, broken guitar strings, clothes and guitar picks.

I walked into the bathroom, thinking that I should be grateful for jumping to conclusions about Makiko. I really didn't want to clean Kaoru's apartment. I would get too frustrated and kill him with one of the guitar strings.

I washed off my face, and headed back to the car where Gackt, Kaoru, and surprisingly Die were. When Die saw me, he smiled and motioned for me to come over. Kaoru and Gackt seemed to get along fine for, it looked like Gackt had been laughing.

"To-chan," Die put his arm around me, "so what did Kyo do? Was he pissed? Why'd he get taken off by the pigs? It was something stupid huh?"

"Let go of me," I wasn't in the mood for the teasing I usually got from Die, "Miyavi made a pass at me, and Kyo went berserk. It wasn't anything special, just stupid male jealously."

They all looked at me, in silence. Kaoru looked at little pissed, Die had a huge grin on his face, and Gackt… just looked at me blankly. "Tora," Kaoru was the first to speak, "When a guy tries to kill another guy for flirting with their girl, it's not, 'no big deal.'"

"Why?" I almost wanted to laugh slightly, "It's just testosterone in the males freaking out."

Die spoke up, "When Kyo had other girl friends who would cheat on him, or other men flirted with them, Kyo didn't care. He would just stop talking to them, and not care."

Kaoru patted my head, "That's why you're so special. You made Kyo a real man, so you better not think, 'Kyo kicking the shit out of some guy for me is wrong,' or 'Getting jealous and doing something to make sure that his woman stays with him.'"

"We were worried about Kyo for a long time," Die sighed, finally looking serious, "He really changed after he met you. Please, stick around through thick and thin. We really rely on you Tora."

"I will."

The phone finally rang, and I was a little scared to pick it up. I stared at it for a few seconds when Kaoru picked it up and handed it to me, "Mushi, mushi…" I waited for a moment, there was a lot of background noise, "Is anyone there?"

"…Tora, they said that I could leave." Kyo sighed, he sounded really bad, "Yoshiki sent a lawyer over here, and he got me free pretty fast. Do you think…" he hesitated; I had never heard Kyo like this, "…come and get me, if it's not too much trouble."

"Of course," I tried to lighten his mood a little, "I'd go anywhere for you."

"Fine, see you soon." He was really down.

"Wait!" I almost yelled into the phone, "Don't hang up yet!"

"What?" he wanted to get off, his coldness was starting to affect me.

"Tell me you love me." I pleaded.

"Goodbye." There was a distinct click, and the line went dead.

Why did I do that? What was my problem? She surely hated me by now, and there was nothing I could do to fix what I had done. I had a plan in my head, it was to leave Tora and let her get on with her life. There was no way that she would be able to.

Our life together would be one scandal after another, according to the media. If Tora gets mad, its my fault, if I get hurt, it was suicide.

There were several times when I almost asked her to marry me, but I pussied out. She wouldn't want to marry me. I had the ring tucked away in a safe place, until I felt it was right, but now I would have to return it.

What a waste.

I followed one of the guards to the waiting room, and covered my face with my hands. How did I get out of this so easily? Did money really influence this world so much? How fucked.

The door opened, and Tora stood before me. He looked like she had been crying. My every instinct told me to take her into my arms and kiss her, but I couldn't do that.

My heart melted when she put her hand out and smiled, "Kyo, lets go home." Her tears were starting to fall over her cheeks again. She looked so beautiful, but sad. I took another look at her hand, and walked away from her.

"Kyo, don't be a dick!" I turned to the right to see Die, he must've came with her, "She wants to help you. She's not mad, and she never was." My fist flew up and I punched him hard on the chest.

"Leave me the fuck alone." I walked out of the building, I could hear footsteps following me, "My mom's house is on the other side of town; could you take me there?" I looked at the taller man, some pop star bitch, "he nodded at me, and walked to the driver's side of the car.

"Kyo, where are you going?" Tora grabbed my arm, he body was shivering, "What are you doing?"

"Tora," I took her head in my hands, and looked into her deep amber eyes, "I know I fucked up, and this can't go on. This is too much stress on you, and I know that you can't keep going on like this. I'm sorry."

"I-I…" more tears, damn my heart hurt badly, "I don't understand." She sobbed softly.

"It's over." I whispered as she leaned her head on my chest. As I spoke these words, he crying became louder and stronger, "Go live your life. I'm not good enough for you. I can't hold onto you anymore. When two people grow in different directions, things can get complicated. You don't deserve the drama." I wrapped my arms around her tightly.

"Don't do this…" she cried over and over, clinging to me tightly, "You can't."

I pulled her away from me, and kissed her forehead, "I will love you forever."

"Kyo…" her wise eyes saw right through me, "No…"

"I love you." I turned my back, ready to leave her, but she grabbed my back and clung desperately. My heart started to turn to molten magma, I felt like I was loosing, "Tora…" I turned around again, "You said so yourself, you want a life. I'm giving one to you."

"You're my life…" her broken face was pale, like porcelain, a lost soul wandered in her eyes, "You can't just take away everything between us. I don't care anymore about being an art student, I have you and that's enough." She closed her eyes, "I'm not enough, is that it?"

_No, no, no, no! You're perfect, smart, talented and beautiful! _My sight was clouded by rage at myself; _you are all I could ever ask for! I need you, so much. _My mind was telling me to tell her this, but I knew what had to be done.

She needed to be free.

"Tora…" I pulled her off me once more, being firm, "I'll be by to get my things…"

I pressed my lips to hers softly, and walked away. The sound of her sobs grew louder with every step that I made. I could hear Kaoru yelling for me, but I ignored it. He would try to fix things.

If I went back, I would give in, and hold her in my arms.

She needed to be free.

I would always love her.

This is NOT the end, there is still more!

~Ware-Yami-Tote~


	7. Chapter 7

Warmer, Section Seven

By: Ware-Yami-Tote

Dir en Grey

"You want me to do what?" Shinya stared at me in disbelief, I had been staying with him for a couple of days, "There's no way that I could do that Tora."

"Please," I asked trying to give him the scissors, "its tradition."

"What if I mess up?" he looked at me nervously, holding his dog Miyu, "Kyo would freak out on me."

"It's not like he cares anymore," I could feel tears burning my eyes again; "It's cutting a straight line. Big deal. I was thinking of cutting my hair anyway. It's almost to my butt. Forget it, I'll go ask Die to cut it." I also wanted it cut because Kyo loved my hair, and he would always play with it. I needed it gone; it was starting to piss me off.

"No! He'll shave it for a laugh." Shinya put Miyu down and took the scissors from my hand. We went into his small bathroom, and I sat on the toilet, "Are you sure about this?"

"Yes." I confirmed.

Shinya took a piece of my hair, "This is it." I could sense that he was nervous.

"Do it."

I sat in the recording room, messing with different sounds, not really making any progress on our album. You could make so many different noises with this thing it was really cool. I had to keep turning it up louder, because even though it was silent in the room, the headphones didn't seem to be loud enough.

There was a knock on the door, and I ignored it. It didn't matter who it was, nothing could make me feel better. The sound kept getting louder and louder in my head, I was surprised that I didn't have a migraine. The volume was almost all the way up.

I looked into the one way mirror, Die was hooking up his guitar, he was practicing again. He was always trying to improve, it was almost admirable. He positioned his hands on the neck of the guitar, and strummed down hard.

His guitar was hooked up to my headphones. He used the wrong cord, and the sound went straight into my ear.

There was a pulse that went through my head and a strong pain that followed. I threw off the headphones, and clutched my head tightly. A warm wet feeling trickled down the left side of my head. My head felt like it would fall off, and the blood hit the floor.

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

My sight was blurred a little by the pain, and soon I could hear yells, but barely. They were muffled and panicked; this was really no big deal. I could just go home and sleep it off. Whenever I got hurt, it usually worked.

I looked up, and Die looked really pale. He grabbed me and started carrying me out of the recording room. I let him, he would feel stupid after he learned that there wasn't anything wrong. Die passed Kaoru, and set me down.

He stared to yell, at least it seemed that way to me. He was flailing his arms around, though his voice was hardly loud enough to hear. It was all rather confusing.

Kaoru took his phone out and started dialing a number. Die grabbed my arm and took me down to the lobby. He checked out, and took me outside. I needed to get some control on this situation. I pulled my arm away, and stormed off back towards the building.

He pushed me back to him, and he picked me up. Damn my size. I started to hit him hard with my fists, but he wouldn't let go. Die struggled with me, and managed to put me in the car. He activated the child safety and ran over to his side.

When he closed the door, he rummaged in his glove box and pulled out a paper and a pen. He wrote down something very quickly and almost threw it in my face.

_If we don't get you to the hospital, you could go deaf._

_Do you want that? You can say sayonara to Dir en Grey._

I put my hand over my left ear, the blood had already started to dry. I closed my eyes and gave in, he seemed to know what he was talking about. Die wasn't an idiot; he was just trying to help me. I would have to apologize after I could hear again.

"What are you saying?" Kaoru called me in the middle of my hair cutting, but Shinya managed to finish. My head felt lighter, "He's tougher than that."

"From what I saw" Kaoru started to explain, "It looked like Acute Acoustic Trauma, its common in our profession. All the loud music and blow can ear drum or two. Die's taking him to the hospital." I processed the information quickly.

"He could go deaf?" I started to panic, "What can I do?!" Shinya looked at me, worried painted his face, "What hospital? Is he there yet?"

"Calm down Tora." Shinya wrapped his arm around me, "Can I talk to Kaoru?" I handed him his phone, since mine was still in my missing purse that was left at the Visual-Kei building. "Kaoru, do you want me to…" he trailed off and listened for about five minutes, "Understood, see you soon." He closed his phone. "Get your jacket."

I obeyed him without asking, I kinda already knew where we were going. We walked down to his car, and he was silent for the entire drive to the hospital. He got out of the car, and I stayed. When he noticed that I wasn't following him, he walked back and opened my door.

"What are you doing?" he questioned.

"I'm not going in there." I sighed fiddling with the bottom of my jacket, "He won't want to see me, I just make him angry and he hates me."

"Tora…" Shinya sighed and hugged me, "Ever since he left you, he's been a zombie. He wrote this song about being in love with you, and his heart was turning into ash, something like that. He does not hate you," he pulled away from the hug, "He left you so that you could do what you wanted with your life. He thinks he ruined it."

"Well that's definitely not true." I told him, "We pretty much grew up together. You remember what I told you when I was twelve don't you?"

"About your perfect man?" he asked looking puzzled,

"Yea," I confirmed, "That I didn't care what he did, or looked like, or wanted to do. As long as he loved me that was all I needed." Tears started to fall out of my eyes, "Kyo is the one, and he doesn't know it. He never did anything wrong. I said what I did because I was angry, the current situation was getting out of control, and Kyo needed to calm down. I regretted it right after I said it."

"Tell Kyo that." Shinya told me, "He'll understand. You need to try."

"What if he…" I started, but Shinya hugged me again. He was such an understanding friend, I was so happy that I had met him.

"You're going through a hard time right now," he whispered in my ear, "Give him another chance. He told me that even if he asked you to take him back, you wouldn't." He paused for a moment, "Let's go show him he's wrong.

"…" I looked up at my best friend, "Alright."

Once again, I was in the hospital, but this time someone I cared for was in danger. It was later at night so there weren't as many people here, but it still felt claustrophobic. Hospitals always made me think of Tatsu.

Shinya and I sat down in some of the chairs, and soon enough, Kaoru was walking out of the emergency room with Toshiya and Die. They all looked thoroughly worried and tired. Toshiya smiled when he saw me, and ran over to hug me.

"He's going to be alright." He explained, "He's in surgery right now."

"Surgery?" I gasped and let go of Toshiya, "Is it that serious? What the hell happened that made his ear drum burst?"

Die spoke up, looking ashamed, "He was messing around in the recording room when I had went in there. He seemed to have the headphones on pretty loud, cause he ignored me when I came in." he took a deep breath, "I plugged my guitar in, and I guess it was the wrong wire, cause It wasn't making any sound. So I went to go see what was going on, and Kyo was bleeding from his ear. I feel terrible."

"Don't feel bad." Kaoru put his hand on Die's shoulder, "It was an accident, it happens. I'm sure he's not mad at you." He paused for a moment, "He did punch you pretty hard, so maybe consider it payback.

"That's not funny," Shinya stood up and glared at Kaoru, "Without Kyo, this band is nothing. He really makes this work, you realize that right? We grew up with him, he's our friend, and without being able to hear, how will he sing?"

"He won't go deaf," I said determined to be in denial, "he'll be okay." I felt more tears, I was so weak. Soon, I couldn't control myself and I was sobbing uncontrollably. I covered my face with my hand; if I was there for him he wouldn't be in this state.

A presence surrounded me, and I snapped back to reality. Kaoru, Shinya, Toshiya, and Die all had me in a group hug. They were all quiet and supporting, "Tora, you're part of this band too." Toshiya said, "You're important, and when you cry, we all want to cry too."

"We've all got your back." Kaoru continued, "You've got to stick around… and give me Makiko's number…" Everyone laughed, including me. These guys were my family, and even if Kyo and I didn't work, they would still be my brothers.

I had a wonderful family.

Kyo finally came out of surgery, and when I had walked into his room he was asleep. They must've given him some strong drugs for the pain, because he seemed to have immunity to any kind anesthesia.

Half of his head was bandaged, and he was talking in his sleep. He did that a lot, and sometimes it was about me or giant warumono dolls coming to take him away. This time he looked stressed and was tossing his head left and right. It must've been the drug.

"…dammit…" he whispered furrowing his brow, "…leave me the hell alone…"

Warumono dolls for sure.

I pulled up a chair next to his bed, and sat down. I took his cold hand in my warmer one, and pressed my cheek against. The tattoos on his white hands stood out more than usual. I closed my eyes.

I started to quietly sing one of my favorite songs…. He always sang to me.

Setsunasa no kagiri made dakishimete mo

Itsumade mo hitotsu ni wa narenakute

Yasashisa yori fukai Basho de

Fureau no wa itami dake

As I sang, Kyo's hand grabbed my face, he was awake. He looked pissed, but why? "Hey…" I smiled trying to hide the worry on my face, "How are you feeling?"

His eyes narrowed, "Like shit. Talk louder, I can barely hear you." He smiled, and held my hand tightly, "Like I said before, you really can sing. Why don't you look into it?" I rolled my eyes, Kyo and I had, had this conversation several times before, and he never won. "What did you do to your hair?"

"Kyo, that's for later. I wanted to tell you that I was sorry." I sighed deeply, really unsure of where to start, "What I had said before, I didn't mean it. I was angry and confused. Gackt had to hand me a tampon and-"

"Hahahahaa…" Kyo started to laugh, "Die told me that, but its funnier coming from you." I could feel the heat race up my neck; I was really embarrassed about that. "Why are you blushing? I think it's hilarious."

"Kyo I'm serious here!" I was yelling a little, "Could you please just listen?!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" he still had a little humor in his voice, "I'm listening, I'll never bring it up again. But before you start again, I want you to know that I'm sorry about what I did. I've felt so small since that day, I feel like I hurt you badly, and I never want to do that again."

"Kyo, does that mean that you still love me?" I whispered.

"I never stopped." His eyes looked lovingly at me, they were warm and soft, "I just hope that you still love me. You mean so much to me, I'm sorry for what I said."

We sat in silence for a few minutes looking at each other, he looked so sad. He was the only one for me, and I was the only one for him. He smiled slightly and sighed, "What are you thinking about."

He hesitated for moment, and then acted on his thought, "I'm thinking about how this is a bad idea." He closed his eyes and let go of my hand, "Tora, are you really ready to deal with all this pressure?" he covered his face with his hand, "We have a tour coming soon, I'll have to leave soon. Are you okay with that?"

"Sure, I'm fine with that." I stood up and moved his hand from his face.

"What about your school?" he looked really confused.

"I've been thinking about quitting that place anyway." I confessed, "They're nothing but a bunch of tight-wads. I really can't stand that place anymore."

"Tora, that can't be true," he lowered his head, "You said yourself that you had plans and goals, they've all been trashed thanks to me."

"Kyo, I gave them up." I explained, "You didn't have anything to do with it. I was just really pissed, and confused and on my period. That damn birth control makes me mean when I'm on my period. It really stinks."

"Well then don't take anymore." He said grumpily, "Then we can have a kid and get married."

"Whatever." I laughed, "Like you would want to get married." I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms, "That's the last thing on your mind."

"Oh yea, well go look in the right pocket of my jeans." He pointed to the counter where his clothes were. My heart stopped, was he being serious. His eyes were calm and focused, "Go look at it."

I walked slowly to the counter, picked up the pants, and dug my hand in the pocket. My hand wrapped around a small velvet black box with gold trim. My hands trembled as I opened it, revealing a small silver ring with topaz gems on the band. It was my birthstone. "Kyo, when did you get this?"

"About a year ago…" he confessed, "I started carrying it around in my pocket after I broke up with you." He turned a little red, "I was going to ask you to marry me."

"Kyo…" My heart felt like it was burning, "I don't know what to say."

"You can say, 'I'll marry Kyo.'" He grinned, "I'll stay with you forever, and you are my knight in shining armor. All that junk."

"You're a dork…" I whispered.

"Tora, I'm asking you to marry me." He put his hand out, "Give me the ring." I obeyed him, and returned the ring to him. He pulled his blanket off, and detached all the wires that were on him. He stood on the floor and got on his knee.

"Kyo, get back in bed!" I cried trying to get him to stand up, "You're crazy with the drugs they pumped into you!"

"Tora Murasaki-"

"-Kyo stop!"

"-will you take me as your-"

"-You're going to get hurt-"

"-Husband?" There was a thick silence between us as he looked up at me. The determination in his eyes were frightening. When he finally said the words out loud, it was the most wonderful feeling ever.

Me as Kyo Niimura's wife, Tora Niimura. Sure I would miss my old name, it did mean purple, but Kyo's family name had so much more meaning to it. It meant that I belonged to Kyo, and he would always take care and love me.

What about his fans? If they found out he was married, he could loose popularity. "Kyo what about your fans? If they knew you were tied down, what do you think they would do?"

"All my fans like you." He laughed, "They all like Toshiya and Shinya anyway in the fangirl sense. It seems to me that I scare them."

I was really confused, "What about your career?"

"Tora, I'll quit if you want me to." He stood up and hugged me, "I knew that if I saw you again, that I would give in and take you back. Please, be my wife. I want to spend my life with you forever." He looked deeply into my eyes.

His words were like magic, "Kyo I will marry you," his eyes seemed to light up, "but take care of things first. When your music career is stable enough, then it would be the right time to get married. I don't want to get in the way, you deserve that much at lease. Please, just wait for a few years. I'm not even sure if I'm ready for that."

As what I said sunk into his understanding, the glow in his eyes slowly disappeared. "So that's a no. I knew I shouldn't have asked."

"Kyo!" I cried, confused by what he was saying, "I want to marry you, but you need to do this for yourself before you think about me. All you ever do is think about me, and it's about time you do something for yourself. You're not listening to me, I'm saying yes, but we have to wait. I kinda always wished you would ask me,"

"R-really?" he looked really rejected.

"Yes. I knew my answer before I even thought about it." I explained, "I want you do what you want, so that our children can have a good life. Do you understand?"

Kyo didn't answer; he just kissed me softly and held me. I was afraid to hold him too tightly; because I didn't want to hurt his injury, "Promise me…" he whispered softly, "Promise me that you'll marry me."

"I promise."


	8. Chapter 8

Warmer Chapter Eight

Dir en Grey

Ware-Yami-Tote

I know this one is short, but I've got more, and I'm out of time for today! So, look for the next chapter tomorrow!

Time passes when you're taking care of someone other than yourself. When you love someone so much, you're willing to forget about your own needs, and you want to make the others life so much better than what you had. Love is a strange emotion; it can't be written down or logically proven. It's something that just happens and never stops growing, even if the person you love is no longer in your life.

Love is a small seed, and if taken care of properly, watered with attention and care; it can blossom into something wonderful. Something so small can mean the world to one person, yet with one hateful gesture it can be torn down in an instant. Though, time may heal it, if given the chance.

Tora

"So that means that he'll be okay?" I looked at the doctor, his name escaped me. I never was good at recognizing them, they all looked the same. It had been about a month since Kyo's accident with his ear, and the doctor said that it was healing better than expecting.

"He says that there is still slight discomfort in his ear," he told me, "but with a little more time, he'll be able to sing. We were lucky that it was only one ear, but he'll be partially deaf in his left ear for the rest of his life." I wanted to heave a huge sigh of relief, but we still weren't out of the woods yet, "He needs to take better care of his body. He's so small."

Each time I would ask Kyo how his ear felt, he told me that it felt great, was he lying to me? "Sensei, is there anything that I can do to help?" I asked worriedly, I felt useless when he would just lay there in bed and laugh at how stupid the whole situation was. He always had a blank stare whenever I entered the room, and when he saw me, he would smile and act like nothing was wrong.

"You can just be there for him." The doctor grabbed my shoulder and squeezed it supporting, "He talks about you often, and it's obvious he cares for you deeply."

When I left the doctors office, I finally let out my sigh. This had all been rather stressful, waiting for Kyo's test results took much too long, and when the weight was lifted, I felt lighter. I looked down the hall, ready to go tell Kyo the news, but I felt a little dizzy. The hall looked longer than I could remember, it sort of stretched.

I saw a man, standing across the hall from me, just staring. He had short black hair, and he was wearing a black suit. He smiled back at me kindly, as though he was waiting for me. He finally said, "How are you?"

I knew that I really wasn't supposed to talk to strangers, but he seemed harmless enough, "I'm fine, just a little winded that's all." I picked myself off the overly white wall and stood up fully, "Thank you for your concern."

Before I could really think about it, the man was closer to me, and he grabbed my arm, "Tora?" he asked, a small devilish grin cracked his lips, "You're Tora Murasaki, right?" the grip on his arm tightened slightly, "You have no idea how much I've wanted to meet you."

"I d-don't understand…" I looked at him, an average business man type grabbing a young girl. "Please let me go." I pleaded softly, "I need to go…" I had never met a fan like this before, nor had I ever thought I had fans. I wanted to Kyo to get all the publicity, he was the one that wanted to be famous.

"Shh, it's okay." He grinned, "You're the prettiest girl I've ever met." He whispered, "I never thought I would run into like this. Not ever in a million years, but here you are." He glanced at his watch, and then looked worried, "Here, come with me to my car, we can talk more on the way there."

"Excuse me!" I yelled, "I don't even know you!" He ignored my comment and started to drag me down the hall away from Kyo's room. "Hey! This isn't funny!" I struggled against his arm, but he was stronger than he looked. "Help." I cried out desperately when we reached the elevators.

Panic set in when no one heard my plea. My only hope was that someone in the elevators would help me get away from this crazy man, "It won't be long now," the man said as the meter on the upper part of the elevator door indicated that it was one floor away from us.

When the door opened, I almost started crying when I saw Kaoru and Makiko standing in front of us. Maki looked shocked and Kaoru looked pissed, "What in the hell are you doing?" he snarled, "Do you know him?" he looked to me. When I nodded no, Kaoru grabbed the man's arm and yanked me free from his grip. I fell on the floor.

The man looked down at me, looking slightly lost, then his face contorted into an angry shape, "What the hell are you doing!?" he roared at Kaoru, "That was my chance!" He shoved past Kaoru and Maki and made it in time to go down the elevator.

Kaoru, Maki, and I all stood there in silence. Something like that happening was strange. Did fans really do that? They really went to the extent of kidnapping? "Are you okay, Ne-san?" Maki finally said, "Are you hurt?"

"No…" I sighed as a headache rushed to my temples, "He was just crazy."

"You have to look out for people like that." Kaoru looked down, "Just an hour ago, someone tried to cut Tochi's hair." I looked up at him in disbelief, "I'm not kidding. Some fans do stuff like that. You just have to be more careful, it seemed like that guy was your stalker or something."

"A stalker?" I asked in wonder, "Why would I have a stalker? I'm not even famous." I rubbed my head in frustration. "This is all rather confusing. Should I get a bodyguard?"

Maki laughed, "Tell Kyo about it, and you won't have to! He'll eat that guy alive."

I laughed, and so did Kaoru. She was always able to bring up the bright side of things. "Hey…" I started to put some things together in my mind, "What the hell are you doing here?"

Maki looked like she was caught stealing something and Kaoru looked away, "I uh…" she looked around, "Let's go see Kyo!" she ran down the hall and went straight to his room, like she had been there before. Kaoru just stood there, not meeting my gaze, and he bit his lower lip.

"Shinya gave me the number…" he whispered, "She wanted to make sure Kyo was okay. They are like brother and sister you know…" he met my gaze, and when he saw my irritation, he looked away immediately, "I'm sorry, I can never say no to her. She's so convincing."

I rolled my eyes, and starting walking away from him, "I don't care anymore, she's almost eighteen anyway." I sighed, "She's gotta grow up sometime. I just wished you wouldn't have stopped bothering me about her number. I was about to give in."

Kyo

The door flung open, and Makiko fell on the ground, "I've got to hide!" she whispered crawling on her hands and feet under my bed, she then grabbed my blanket and draped it over the side closer to the ground. "I'm not here!" I almost called out to her, and asked what was wrong when I saw Tora and Kaoru walk in soon after her. I immediately stopped and acted like there was nothing wrong.

"Hey!" I felt my eyebrow twitch a little as I tried to act normal, "How's it going?!" Tora crossed her arms and looked at me with a raised brow, and Kaoru looked like he was about to start cracking up any moment, "What did the doctor say? Anything good, he is a nut job after all."

"Where is she?" Tora always seemed to see through me, "Kaoru needs to talk to her." Tora rose her foot, and placed it on the side of the bed, then proceeded to shake it roughly, "Come on out imouto! Your boy toy wants you!" Maki stifled a laugh, but stayed under the bed.

Tora then grabbed the covers and pulled them up over me, "You found me!" Maki exclaimed.

"You're the worst hider ever!" Tora laughed, "Get your butt out from under there." She reached under and helped Maki out, "Go out to the hall, and figure things out." She pointed to Kaoru, and instantly she ran over to him and dragged him out of the room.

"That was interesting." I said instantly, rearranging my blankets, "You've given in?"

"You knew I would." She blushed.

"Yea, I know." I grinned, "So when do I get out of here!? I'm ready to rock and roll!" I made my fist into devil horns, "My fans need me!"

Tora laughed, "The doctor said in two days was when you could leave." I yelled a call of victory, "BUT, you can't go on rocking just yet. You need to get better all the way. He said that you might have to wear a hearing aid during your concerts."

"Wow, I'm old." I laughed, "Fine, whatever, just get me the hell out of here!"

"Sure," she giggled, and took my hand, "Then when you get home, you deserve a treat." Right as she said that, my mind assumed the worst, I was a guy after all. When she saw my grin, she immediately turned red, "That's not what I meant you freak! I was talking about going someplace nice or vacationing or something!"

I couldn't stop grinning. "I'd rather have you."

She rolled her eyes, and walked out of the room.

Tora had rarely been to the house while I was in the hospital. When she dropped my bag on the ground a little dust rose in the air, "Um, why hasn't my mom been here?" I looked around, the place wasn't a mess, it just wasn't lived in. It seemed musty.

"She's been down in Okinawa." She fiddled with the hem of her jacket, "She told me she would look after it while I was with you at the hospital, but she left two days later." That figured; she was with her boyfriend in one of the best places in Japan. Damn I was jealous, "I was going to clean it, but you came back much sooner than expected."

"It's okay," I took my jacket off, and then my shirt, "Cleaning can wait." She started to protest but I cut her off, "I need some release Tora." She went silent, and turned red, "Why is our love life so… difficult?"

"I don't know…" she looked away from me. I took her shoulders and brought her closer to me, and held her against my bare chest, "I'm just scared I guess. I really need to get over Tatsu." I could feel her tears on my overly warm skin, "I know he's gone now, and he can't hurt me, but he's still there in my mind."

"Tora…" My heart felt heavy and almost dead when she spoke of Tatsu. There were times when I was sure she managed to let it go, but then she comes back with her memories of him. It was enough to make me want to kill him. "I love you…" I kissed the top of her head, and squeezed her closer to me, "Please, don't be scared, you're with me."

She looked up at me, and kiss me softly, "I'll try"


	9. Warning Peoples From me! Warechan!

_**Attention all Warmer Fanfiction fans**_

_**This is Ware-Yami-Tote speaking straight to the keyboard.**_

_**Do you love this fanfiction?**_

_**Do you want Kyo and Tora to get it on?**_

_**Well then fucking tell me!**_

_**Fuck!**_

_**(sorry, tourrets)**_

_**Here's the problem, I have so many ideas for them. At least I think I do. My fans haven't been giving me any input and complaining at me to write more. Hassle me, I thrive on stress! Goddamn!**_

_**Give me some things that you would like to see, or what you would like me to write. I am not adding any more characters and not turning this into a joint project, sorry.**_

_**Please let me know I'm still loved.**_

_**Ware-chan.**_

_**^-^**__**v *0***_

_**It's raining outside, and that means I can't get out of the computer thingy to go eat dinner… crap! Karma, this is what I get for yelling at my fans….**_

_**GOMENASAI!**___


	10. Chapter 9

Warmer Chapter Nine

Dir en Grey

Ware-Yami-Tote

This chapter is dedicated to MoonChildAddict

Tora

I had no time to think as Kyo was rushing me into our room, and pretty much picked me up and threw me on the bed. He then proceeded to start stripping and more soon after he was over me, trying to get my pants off.

Of course I let him; he really deserved some physical attention. He had been really patient with me all these years, and soon I needed to get over my insecurities. I knew that he would always be there for me, and make sure that I was safe and happy.

He kissed me slowly and softly, sending chills down my spine. His hands moved over the contours of my body, he was being slow and taking his time, "I really love you, do you know that?" He whispered in my ear, "I know that things are little rough, but please, stick this out with me. That's all I want."

I pulled my body up, and kissed his lips softly, "Of course I will." I smiled at him, and a small glint was in his eyes. Kyo grabbed the back of my head, and using my hair as some kind of mind control, he exposed my neck. His mouth traced up and down my nape, tracing his teeth softly over my pale skin.

When he moaned, I knew it was time to get serious. I stripped myself of my shirt, trying to be as smooth as possible, that made me feel a little stupid, but I tried. Instead of getting a strange look from Kyo, he just grinned. This told me he was definitely turned on, and I was most certainly ready to help him.

Kyo wrapped his arms around me quickly, and un-hooked my bra. Gravity hit my chest, but instantly Kyo had his hands and mouth on my chest. He sucked on my nipple hard, sending a hot rush to my core. His right hand went down the center of my back, and it followed down into my panties. He tore them off impatiently, surprisingly not ripping them this time.

"Good boy." I laughed, I was going to say something else, but was cut off when he dug his nails into my back. I called out, not expecting pleasure for something so sadistic. By the time he had gotten me naked, I felt heavy and sensual. When Kyo took off his boxers, he was hard. "For once, I'm really excited and not nervous like I always am."

"That's always good." He smirked at me, telling me that he wasn't going to hold back, He always told me he never did, but I knew he had a fear of scaring me and he would always pull back his real feelings for me. It was irritating.

Kyo's mouth claimed mine sweetly, as if he was preparing me for something. He left my mouth, and left small kisses down the valley of my breasts and the basin of my lower belly. Kyo grabbed my leg, kissing and biting my inner thigh softly. I felt exposes, but it was natural, it didn't make me feel awkward.

When he kissed my center, I jumped, "What the hell are you doing?!" I supported myself on my elbows trying to get his attention, but he ignored me. He kissed it again and again, "Hey are you listening to me?!" he took his fingers and exposed me, then pressed his mouth against my opening, I almost cried out loud.

His mouth worked slowly first, but then got faster and faster. I could feel my orgasm starting to build, and by body was lightly coated in sweat. I tried to take deep breaths to calm myself, but the pressure was just too much.

I came into his mouth, and he laughed, "You really liked that didn't you?" He licked his lips and crawled over the top of me, "I don't think you've ever squirmed that much before." I looked away, embarrassed and unsure of what to say, "Hey, you're reaction was perfectly normal."

"And you know that why?" I raised an eyebrow, suddenly feeling defensive.

"It's not like I have ever done that to anyone other than you." Kyo grumbled, "You should hear some of the stories Die tells me, they would be enough to send you crawling under the wood floor." His brow was knit together as if it was a painful thing to talk about it.

"Fine." I flipped my hair out of my eyes and stared at him, waiting to see who would make the first move. His eyes narrowed as if he suspected me of something impertinent, a small crooked smile formed on his lips.

As quickly as I could, I grabbed his shoulders and flipped him onto his back, straddling him. "Well this is new!" he said astonished, he had a spark of adventure in his eyes, "I'm at your command…" his eyes flashed sarcasm.

"Shut up." I growled and kissed him, and he kissed me back demanding action.

"You're being a cock blocker right now…" he said, flustered.

Laughing, I grabbed his length and put it inside me, it was more difficult than usual but I managed. "There, you broke the blockade."

Kyo raised his eyebrow and trailed his hands over my hips and breasts luxuriously, "You're beautiful." He said breathless, "I'm so lucky I found you." He looked like he was almost going to cry, "Thank you."

"For what?" I never got an answer. I should have known better than to straddle him, he was into dominancy and I was too submissive. He grabbed me and flipped me back onto my back and started thrusting vigorously.

I was already tight from the previous actions from Kyo, and he thrusted hard fast strokes. Another orgasm was burning in me, and he held me tightly, his ragged keeping time with each movement. He started whispering in my ears, but I could barely hear him. I dug my nails into his back as my body demanded release.

I muffled my scream as Kyo and I orgasmed together in his neck. I called his name, and he kissed me sweetly, lovingly.

"Tora, I love you…" he whispered, and then started to sing, "Ano basho de deatta ne ima de wa mou nani mo dekinai…"

"I've never heard that one before," I sighed, "When did you make it?"

"Two seconds ago," he admitted.

"It sounds sad."

"It's not finished." He lifted me up over him to lay on his chest, "There will be a happy ending." I closed my eyes and listened to his heart.

"When will you finish it?" I asked lifting my head to look at him.

"When you marry." His eyes looked solemn, "I'll sing the rest to you when you on our honeymoon night." He looked at me, waiting for an answer.

"I can't wait until then." I smiled and kissed his chest, "Tora Niimura." Kyo laughed and leaned his head back sighing, "I love the way it sounds."

^.* Black Eye!

I walked toward the recording studio, ready to make our album. I had 3 months of recovery, and I was tired of bed rest. I didn't rest a lot in bed, thanks to Tora being a goddess, and not meaning to be. I was still in bed though.

"I haven't seen you in forever!" I said as I walked into the meeting room, "I'm ready to do this!" the guys looked at me, shocked and confused. The bombarded me with questions like, 'why are you here so early?' and 'how's your ear?'

"Guys I'm fine!" I laughed, "I had a good rest, and I'm ready to make some music!"

Kaoru looked annoyed, "Can you still sing?"

"Do I get laid every night?!" Die laughed, "Of course I do! Don't ask stupid questions dude, Kyo can still sing!" I reached into my bag and pulled out a little white zippered box. They all stared at it, "What's that?" Die was the first to say anything.

"A hearing aide." I told them.

"You're not that old." Shinya said worried.

Toshiya punched him in the arm, "Fool, it's so he can hear better in his ear."

"Yeah!" I exclaimed, "Let's get cracking!"

There was cough in the back of the room, Yoshiki sat at the front of the table looking concerned, "You have no idea what the tabloids have been saying do you?" he picked one out from under the desk, "It says you hurt yourself intentionally."

"I don't care." I tried flaking it off, "Music is all that's important."

"Kyo-"

"Yoshiki, trust me." I walked over to him and grabbed his shoulder, "Everything is going to be just fine. I feel golden, and I'm ready to make some fan-girls cream their panties." Toshiya and Die laughed, "Are you with me guys?"

In unison they said, "Hell yea."

3 months later. (Time Surge Power Go!)

When Tora cried, it was upsetting. She stood at the metal detector of the airport looking broken, "Remind me again why you won't go with me?" I said impatiently wiping away her tears with my thumb, "I know there's still time to get you a ticket."

"Kyo, this is your first tour." She sighed, "You deserve to go have fun." She grabbed me and buried her head in my chest, sobbing.

When I saw the scene unraveling behind Tora, I almost gagged. Kaoru was holding Maki's trembling, crying body as he sucked her tongue from her face, "Knock it off you two!" I yelled, embarrassed that Tora and I might look like that.

Maki jumped and Kaoru glared at me raising his middle finger. I smirked at him and brought my attention back to Tora, "They're making out again aren't they?"

"Sadly, yes." I tell her, she grumbles something incoherent and hugs me tighter, "Tora, the flights leaving in 5 mintutes…"

She snaps out of it and looks up to me, her eyes shiny and wet from her continuous tears, "Kyoooooooo." She coos, "Call me, and tell me where you're at please…"

"Of course my love." I sigh reluctant to let her go, but I carefully pull her away, "I'll call you whenever I can, the time difference is about 8 hours, so I'll stay up late and call you in the mornings, is that okay?"

She glares at me, "I'll stay up late and call you in the morning."

I didn't feel like arguing at the moment, "How about we alternate, is that alright?"

"Fine," she picked up my bag and threw it at me, "Go make a rock star out of yourself, love." She smiles and grabs my arm, directing me to the metal detectors. She kissed me swiftly, "You get more when you get back."

"Or I could just not go…" I say flustered looking into her eyes, "I'm sure I the guys can rock without me." Kaoru grabbed my arm and stared at me.

"I don't think so." He pushed me through the metal detector and it rang clean. I was surprised that it didn't go off. A long time ago I had a dream that aliens put a metal plate in my head. It must've just been a dream, damn.

"Kyo!" Tora cried as Toshiya and Die grabbed me by my shirt dragging to the terminal, "I love you! Good luck with that American band, Korn!"

I raised my hand with devil horns, "Anything for you. Babe!"


	11. Chapter 10

Warmer Chapter Ten

我、闇とて･･･

Ware-Yami-Tote

(So, since I found out recently that I'm going to the Dir en Grey concert in September, I discovered my writing ability had returned. It was exactly what I needed to start again! I hope you are all happy with this chapter. I based it a lot off of my relationship with my younger sister. My younger life was a lot like Toras. Abusive mother….and some other things were similar too, but I'd rather not get into that.

If only I had Kyo to save me, right? Lol. Oh Well, I've gotten over those things, and now I can write about them. I cherish my younger sister more than my own life, and this chapter is about Makiko's growth as an adult.)

Dir en Grey

Tora

"So everything is here?" I asked the movers. The boss told me that all of it was in check and all there. I paid him and sent him away.

After I was alone, I looked at my phone. It was almost noon. What time was it in America? Twelve at night? One o'clock? Damn, I missed my chance to talk to him. I missed Kyo terribly, I hadn't heard his voice for three days, and I was scared that he was on a rampage there.

My phone ringed and I answered without looking at the number, "Hello? Tora speaking."

"Uh hi…" It was a deep voice, "I stopped by your old house but you weren't there."

"Who is this?" I demanded.

"Gackt…" he stated.

"Oh…" I almost laughed, "Sorry, your first statement sounded kind of scary."

"Gomen, I didn't realize that." He laughed with me, "I thought you had my number. I figured you would have known it was me."

"I didn't look, sorry." There was silence, and then I said, "Uh, what do you need?"

"I stopped by Kaoru's house to drop by some of the albums he let me borrow," he began, "I forgot that he was on tour, but I found your sister there. She said she forgot her ke-" I heard Makiko yell, "I mean, she forgot too!"

"Okay…" I had no idea where this was going.

"She said that she has no place else to go for the summer."

"She was spending the summer with Kaoru?" I yelled. "Get her here now!"

"I would, but… you moved."

"Oh…" man I was lacking in the brain power lately, "Fine, I'll give you the address."

After I told him where our new apartment was, I stared at my phone, waiting for Kyo to call. It stayed silent. He told me he would call me, but I somehow I knew that it would be harder for him than he thought. "_Come with me next time, okay?" _He told me. I said that I wouldn't, but now it seemed like a good idea.

I missed him, and I needed him to hold me for a few hours.

^.* Black Eye

Kyo- (Two days before)

I stared out the buses window, totally drained of all energy. Why the fuck was it daytime? My body wanted sleep, but it was shining bright outside. "Here buddy," Tochi sat down next to me, "drink this." He held two brightly colored cans, "It'll perk you up a bit."

I too one of the cans, "What is it?" I looked at Tochi, he looked just as bad as I felt.

"We all have jet lag, and those Korn guys gave them to us." He opened one, took a drink and winced, "Man that tastes funny. They're called 'Monsters' or something like that. John called them energy drinks, at least that what Shinya translated."

When I opened my can, the smell was strong and strange. There was a clearish semi-green liquid floating around the drink part, "Are you sure this is safe to drink?" Tochi nodded encouragingly. I put the cold tin to my lips and took a deep gulp.

It tasted like liquid gummy bears.

"Do you like it?" he took another swig, "It's supposed to help us get on schedule with our sleeping patterns or something. It tastes like crap…" he sighed.

"Well I like it!" Die was in front of us in the seats ahead, "Americans have no taste buds, cause of all the fast food they eat. That's why they have to make everything taste like fire. This stuff has an amazing after burn!" he laughed.

I started to chug it fast, wanting to get it over with. My throat burned afterwards, but it wasn't that bad. "Well they don't have this stuff at home, I think I'm gonna bring some back with me." I looked at the green on the can, "Tora will get a kick out of it." I smiled to myself; I couldn't wait to see her again.

^.* Black Eye

Tora

The door bell rang, and I opened it. Gackt was sporting a baseball hat, a nice dress shirt and a pair of large sunglasses, "Hey, this place was hard to find!"

"That was the point." I smiled, and showed him inside. Maki followed behind him somberly. She looked like a beaten puppy.

"Hey, ne-san…" she laughed weakly, "How are you? Nice place you have here."

"Go sit on the couch." I pointed to the left and she followed. Gackt was about to follow her, but I grabbed his arm, "I need your help." I pulled him into the other room. He looked confused as I forced him away. "Okay, what the hell do I do? She's almost 18! I can't control her for much longer! She's a crazy spontaneous girl! What should I do?"

Gackt looked shocked, "Uh…" he thought hard, "What where you doing at her age?"

I thought back to 17. I had just met Kyo. I was raped. Hospitalized, but I fell in love. "Believe me, you don't want to know." Gackt looked confused, "Let's just say… I had a lot on my plate. I somehow made it out alive, thankfully."

"Well, try to relate. There must have been some similarities with your lives." I could tell he was struggling.

"Well, we both found men…"

"Is that all?"

"What?"

"You said, 'We both found men.'" He scoffed, "It must be more than that if she's running down from Hokkaido. You should hear the way she talks about Kaoru. The only issue she has with him is that he smokes and that's it."

"Uh how do you know?" Was all that came out.

"I talked to her on the way over." He scratched his head, "That's not the point. She's deeply in love with him. You must feel strongly for Kyo, right? He's marked insane by the press, yet you stay with him. There are tons of men that would like to…" he turned red.

"Like to what?" My mind was blank.

He looked away from me, "Date you." He laughed nervously, and then coughed, "I was there for the Miyavi thing, so I know… All those visual kei guys had googley eyes for you."

"This isn't about me…" I sighed, "So are you saying that I should be okay with her hanging around an older man?"

"She's almost legal." He stated.

"Yeah…" he was right; I couldn't keep her under my thumb. Her dream was to go to American and take college classes there; she should could get better at English (even though she was already amazing.) She had goals and hopes for her life, she deserved better than to be stuck in Japan forever. "Fine, I'll let her go."

Gackt shrugged, and handed me something, "Could you make sure that Kaoru gets these, I have to take off for now." He hugged me, "It was great seeing you, I'll show myself out."

He left me alone holding a large pile of CD's.

After a few moments of silence by myself, I managed to muster enough courage to go and confront Makiko. I set down the cases on a random box and walked out into the living room.

She sat cross-legged on the couch, looking at the ends of her short hair, when she noticed me she smiled, "Ne-san…" she started, but I raised my hand, and she stopped.

"I only have on condition." I sighed, "Make sure he takes care of you."

Maki looked confused, "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that you can do whatever you want with Kaoru…" her eyes lit up, and I regretted saying that, "within reason!" she laughed and climbed off the couch to hug me.

"What changed your mind?"

"You're growing up…" I squeezed her tightly, "I need to learn that, and the only way for me to do that is to let you make your own life."

Tears welled in my eyes as I held her, she was my world. I had raised her, and when I noticed she was growing up, it all seemed like a blur. Her life was taking its course, and I knew that I would always be part of it. That was enough for me.

She was my best friend, and my sister.

That's the best thing about having a sister, you always have a friend.

^.* Black eye

Kyo

"Kyo, you were great." Kaoru told me, "For your first show of the tour, I'd have to say you handled it pretty well. I wasn't so sure about the scratching thing though…"

"Uh…" I looked up from my phone, it was a Japanese phone so I couldn't reach Kyoto, "I was nervous as hell man." I laughed, "I kinda just did that out of a nervous tick thing…or something."

"You were nervous?" Kaoru looked at his watch, "Wow, it's getting late, you better call Tora."

"I can't…" I whined, "My phone doesn't reach all the way to Japan. I have to get a new one."

Shinya walked over to me, "Here use mine." His was nicer and less dropped than mine, "You can go wherever you want, just bring it back to me…" I took it from him and bolted out the door of the tour bus.

Quickly, I looked for Tora's number and pressed enter. It rang a few times and soon she answered, "Shinya? What's up?"

"Uh, it's me." I said.

"Oh! Kyo!" She exclaimed, "How are you? How was the flight? Are you still feeling the jet lag?"

"Woah, one question at a time…" I sighed and thought hard, there was so much I wanted to tell her. About our first tour gig, the fans, the sounds, the butterflies in my stomach… "I miss you," Was all I could say.

"I miss you too…" she coughed lightly, "I really wish you were here right now."

"At least you care…"

"What do you mean?" She asked, almost offended.

"Well…" I started, "It's like… everyone here considers me like an object. I sing, others make money. I'm not sure if this is really what I want to do."

"Tooru Niimura." She growled, using my real name, "Are you on drugs?"

"What?"

"You need to understand," her voice was stern, "You have a talent, and you need to use that talent."

"What's my talent?"

She laughed, "You make people orgasm with your voice."

I laughed with her, "You think I can really do this? America is a BIG place. I feel really small here."

"No size pun intended?" she coughed again after she laughed.

"Are you okay? You sound sick." I asked worried.

"No, I just inhaled some cleaning stuff." She let out a heavy breath, "I'm okay, I'm sure it will be gone within a couple of hours."

"Are you sure?" I pressed.

"Yeah." She said reassuringly and then yawned.

"You can go to bed if you need to. It's still pretty early in the evening here…" I tried to sound like I would be okay after we hung up, but in all truths, I was dreading it.

"Are you sure?" She asked.

"I'm fine," I told her, "I'll call you tomorrow. Where going to Washington DC. We'll be driving all night."

"Well you better get some sleep too." She told me, "I can't have my man tired. You might get sick and die of exhaustion. Then what will you do?"

"If I ever die," I spoke from my heart, "I'll wait at the gates for you until it's time for you to come. Then we can go together."

"No," she stated, "You go, and I'll come and find you." She giggled, "make sure you're good."

"I will." I laughed a little, "I love you."

"I'd hate to start this but…I love you more."

"Are you serious?"

"No, talk to you later." She said, with sadness in her voice, "Be good."

"I always am." I said, trying to sound like I was an angel.

When I hung up the phone, I held the object to my chest. I missed her again. She was thousands of miles away. A rain drop hit the back of my neck, but I still stood even as it started to pour.

Tora was my umbrella.

Hearing her voice only festered the wound of sadness that I tried to swallow. Suddenly, lyrics filled my head:

"_It's easy to stop breathing...but I want to feel you just a little more…"_

"Hey Kyo." Someone grabbed my arm, I turned around, "You're gonna catch a cold if you stand out here much longer. We need you in tip-top shape." Kaoru smiled at me, and led me back to the bus. We were alone, so I just silently laid on my bunk.

"I miss her dude." I whined, "Let's go back to Japan."

"I know…" Kaoru looked frustrated, "I know how you feel. We can't. Isn't this what you wanted?"

"Yeah," I buried my face in the pillow, "I didn't think it would hurt this much."

"Now you realize how much you love her, huh?" Kaoru sat on my bunk and patted me head, "It'll be okay. Besides, if you come back now, Tora will be upset with you."

He was right. Now I really had to work hard, "Well next time… we're brining he girls with us!"

(Lyrics: Ware-Yami-Tote_. It's easy to stop breathing...but I want to feel you just a little more)_


End file.
